Posts Tagged ‘steven tyler

10
Nov
09

Steven Tyler starring in his own real-life remake of “grumpy old men”!

So unless you’ve been either living under a rock or don’t give a shit (i fall under the latter category), you’ve no doubt heard Steven Tyler quit Aerosmith. His now former bandmates heard about it over the internet. FAUX PAS Steven! We know you’re old, but you should still remember your break-up etiquette. I now have a theory that his previous 2 accidents were no accident at all. He knew an actual break-up would be ugly and awkward so he tried to end it. Watch the video and decide for yourself!

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10
Aug
09

Steven Tyler is aging clumsily, not gracefully

OK, this Steven Tyler thing is really bugging me. Not the broken shoulder part, the hurt his leg and postponed 7 shows part. He couldn’t have grabbed a cane like an old man is supposed to and hobbled out on stage? Based on how he handled the leg, you might as well color the whole tour done. Postponed shows that he probably could have done will become cancelled shows. And the fans that had tickets to those 7 cancelled shows might as well kiss any hopes of seeing a Steven Tyler-fronted Aerosmith in this life. The way that dude’s luck is going, a butterfly will flutter it’s wings in China and this will somehow result in him dropping dead on the spot before he can perform again.

Here he is looking crabby because somebody finally told him “dude, you’re fucking 61 years old!”:

steven-tyler

06
Jul
09

Steven Tyler breaks a hip, Aerosmith tour postponed.

aerosmith

Why did this take so long to happen? According to Rolling Stone, Steven Tyler hurt his 60-something year old bones doing a move on stage that is reserved for people in their 20’s, and now Aerosmith is postponing THREE dates from their current tour.

I’m going to treat this like a single elimination tournament that consists of  Mick Jagger, The Boss, Bob Dylan, and Neil Young. Now that Tyler is gone, there’s no telling who will outlast death!

I choose Neil Young, btw.




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